The Upside of Stress by Kelly McGonigal is a solid work of nonfiction by the psychologist and professor. She notes in the introduction that "seeing the upside of stress is not about deciding whether stress is all good or all bad. It's about how choosing the see the good in stress can help you meet the challenges in your life."
It's an interesting and well put together book, with some ideas from it including:
- Stress isn't always bad for you. What is bad is stress when you believe that stress is harmful to you. That's when it can have adverse effects, and bad things snowball.- How you think about something can transform its effect on you. Mindsets are believes that shape your reality. For instance, adults with a positive view of aging have a lower risk of heart attack, and if you don't feel you belong, it often makes it so. You really are making a choice of how to react to something.
- A meaningful life is also a stressful life. It means you're doing things. Think about your values, or bigger-than-self goals, those are the important things.
- Resilience is the courage to grow from stress, to find meaning in it rather than just discomfort. Why should someone be excited before playing a big game, yet negatively stressed before taking a final? It's believing you can handle something stressful that can make it so. Think about how your stress response can be helpful to you. Embracing stress is an act of self-trust, viewing yourself as capable.
- In a situation of stress, caring for others helps them and you, it creates courage and hope. It also goes the other direction. Having a willingness to ask for help should increase your chance of succeeding.
- Just as post-traumatic stress is a thing, so is post-traumatic growth. When something positive can come out of a trauma, it doesn't belong to the trauma, it belongs to you. You're still acknowledging suffering, but also looking for the good that can come out of the pain. It can come in the form of a sense of personal or spiritual growth, an increased appreciation for life, enhanced relationships, or new possibilities or life directions.